The Rich Young Ruler: A Lesson on Money, Contentment, and What We Actually Trust
Using the story of the rich young ruler in Mark 10, teenagers wrestle with the real question Jesus asked — not just about money, but about what we're holding onto instead of God.
Scripture
“As Jesus started on his way, a man ran up to him and fell on his knees before him. 'Good teacher,' he asked, 'what must I do to inherit eternal life?' 'Why do you call me good?' Jesus answered. 'No one is good — except God alone. You know the commandments: You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony, you shall not defraud, honor your father and mother.' 'Teacher,' he declared, 'all these I have kept since I was a boy.' Jesus looked at him and loved him. 'One thing you lack,' he said. 'Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.' At this the man's face fell. He went away sad, because he had great wealth.”
Mark 10:17-22 (NIV)
Getting Started
Before you start: This story hits differently for teenagers than it might for adults. Your students are at the age where they're starting to earn their own money, want their own stuff, and are forming real habits around spending and saving — often without even realizing it. The rich young ruler isn't a villain; he's actually a good, earnest kid who did everything right. That's what makes the story uncomfortable and worth sitting in. Don't rush past the line 'Jesus looked at him and loved him' — that's the heart of the whole passage. Jesus wasn't punishing this guy; he was diagnosing him. One practical tip: resist the urge to make this lesson feel like a lecture about teens spending money on video games or clothes. The goal is to help them ask a bigger question — what is the thing in my life that I'd walk away sad over if Jesus asked me to let it go? Let that question do the work.
What Are You Actually Holding Onto?
Here's what's easy to miss: the rich young ruler was genuinely impressive. He didn't walk up to Jesus with an attitude — he ran and knelt. He wasn't lying when he said he'd kept the commandments. By any religious scorecard of his day, this guy was winning. And Jesus loved him for it. But Jesus looked past the resume and saw something underneath: this man's security, his identity, his sense that everything was going to be okay — it was all tied to his wealth. Not because wealth is evil, but because for him, money had become the thing he trusted most. It was his safety net. His backup plan. His real god. So Jesus didn't give him a rule. He gave him an invitation: *Come follow me.* But to do that, he'd have to let go of the thing he was already following — his financial security. The man walked away sad. Not angry, not defiant — *sad*. Which tells you everything. He knew Jesus was right. He just couldn't do it. Here's the main idea for today: - **The issue isn't money itself.** The Bible doesn't say wealth is evil — it says the *love* of money is a root of all kinds of evil (1 Timothy 6:10). This man's money had become his master without him even realizing it. - **Jesus asks us to identify our 'one thing.'** For this man it was wealth. For someone else it might be status, a relationship, approval, or control over the future. The question is: what would you walk away sad about if Jesus said 'let go of that and follow me'? - **Contentment is a posture, not a number.** It's not about having $0 or donating everything. It's about holding what you have with open hands — willing to use it, share it, or release it when God asks. That posture only comes from trusting that God is actually enough. - **God's hard truths are love in disguise.** Jesus told this man something painful because he loved him — not to shame him but to free him. When God's word makes us uncomfortable, that discomfort is often the most loving thing happening to us.
Discussion Questions
- 1.The rich young ruler kept all the commandments and still felt like something was missing. Have you ever felt like you were doing everything 'right' spiritually but still felt a gap? What do you think causes that feeling?
- 2.Jesus says 'one thing you lack' — and it was different for this specific person. If Jesus looked at your life right now and named *your* one thing, what do you honestly think it might be?
- 3.The passage says Jesus looked at him and *loved* him — and then told him something really hard. What does that tell us about how God deals with us? Does it change how you feel about convicting moments in your faith life?
- 4.The man walked away sad. He didn't argue, he didn't call Jesus wrong — he just couldn't do it. Have you ever known something was right but walked away from it anyway? What made it hard?(optional)
- 5.What's the difference between having money and money having you? Can you think of a real-life example — not necessarily about money — where something good became something you depended on too much?(optional)
Activity — The Tight Fist / Open Hand Exercise
Give everyone a small object — a coin, a pen, a snack, anything handheld. Ask them to grip it as tightly as they can in their fist for 30 seconds. Then ask: what would someone have to do to get that thing out of your hand right now? Next, have them open their hand flat with the object resting on their open palm. Ask: could someone take it now? Could you give it away? Could you drop it if you needed to? Then walk through three reflection questions as a group: 1. In your life right now, what are you holding in a 'tight fist' — something you'd really resist giving up or losing? (It doesn't have to be money — could be a friendship, a plan for the future, your reputation.) 2. What would it look like to hold that same thing with an 'open hand' — still having it, still caring about it, but not gripping it? 3. What would you need to believe about God to actually do that? Wrap up by pointing out: open hands can still hold things. This isn't about having nothing — it's about the posture. The rich young ruler walked away because he couldn't open his fist. The invitation Jesus gave him is still open for us.
Materials: f2c94a67-1e3b-4d80-b6f5-8a0e29d74c12
Before You Leave Today
- What is one thing you're holding with a tight fist right now that you want to try holding with an open hand this week — even just as an experiment?
- The rich young ruler walked away sad because he wasn't ready. Is there anything you've been walking away from that you think God might be calling you back to?
- If contentment means trusting that God is enough — on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you actually believe that right now? What would it take to move that number up by even one point?
Closing
Close by inviting students to pray silently for about 30 seconds — ask them to name their 'one thing' honestly in their heads, just between them and God. Then pray aloud something like: 'God, you looked at the rich young man and loved him. You look at us the same way. Help us trust that you are enough — that following you is not a loss but a gain. Where our hands are tight and our hearts are scared, give us the faith to open up. Amen.' Keep it conversational, not performative — model the honesty you're asking them to have.
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